Monuments To Impermanence

Why is that during my toughest times as a goose, I only see one set of web-footed prints?

2007-02-11T12:50:00.000-06:00

Like the archaeologists that found that 6,000 year-old couple still in an embrace, the snow-covered river left the story of two geese, undoubtedly in love, going for a stroll together.

I imagine that one of these geese is the white domestic goose that has intergrated into the flock of Canadian geese that live here by the river. Truly, even for geese, love knows no color.

You can see that at one point, one of the geese gets sort of distracted and meanders away for a moment. Then, realizing how far he's wandered, he waddles back up, following directly behind her, his prints meshing with hers, until he catches up.

They then waddle away together around the bend, and "get it on".

How's that for a Valentime's post?

Snow kitty

2006-03-05T21:56:00.000-06:00

We haven't had much snow, but luckily I took a lot of photos earlier in the winter. This critter is long gone by now.....but he still stalks me in my dreams.

But he was a titan in his time, seven feet of feline imposition.

Check out the tail and the collar. I love the attention to detail. It would be an honor to feel its' razor-sharp, bacteria-infested claws slicing my eyes out.

It would beat dying on the toilet, at any rate...

snow tracks

2006-02-18T23:54:00.000-06:00

Why should snowpeople get all the glory? On my travels, I've found many interesting things in the medium of snow. No, I'm not talking about dog feces...

There's something very wonderful about a set of animal tracks in freshly fallen snow. I suppose it's the beauty of impermanence. Sort of like a masterpiece done on an Etch-a-Sketch, you know that it won't last for long, and so you're compelled to stare at it, meditate upon it. Then you feel serene. Then you smush the tracks with your foot, and they're gone forever...

microcosm of the packers season

2006-02-11T21:08:00.000-06:00

I know football season is over, so I'll try to be brief.

We all knew it would be a down season, but still 0-4

was unnerving and left us a little wobbly.

But then we beat, nay, spanked the hurricane-weary Saints

52-3. Some people would say it was wrong to kick a team like that

when they are down. Not me. I was on top of the world.

But it was all downhill from there...a long, slow, drawn-out fall

on our asses. On national television, no less.

This picture is oddly reminisent of Bat Starr's plunge across the goal line in the Ice Bowl. Only without the glory. Still, it could be worse...I could be a Viking fan.

venus de milo

2006-02-07T23:25:00.000-06:00

Sadly, the ravages of time and sunshine had already taken their toll by the time I discovered her on a backroad not too far from my house. I couldn't let it go one second more with documenting her for posterity.

Not only do I admire the artist's obvious skill, but also his or her willingness to be seen cupping snow-breasts out in their front yard, in plain view of God and everyone. But then, there is no art without suffering, or at the very least, awkwardness.

Million Snowman March

2006-01-25T19:55:00.000-06:00

Compliments of the Onion:

The Million Snowman March...who says Jesse Jackson doesn't care about white people?

I usually hate to hear crackers complain, but in this case, I'll make an exception.

We shall overcome....

tiny tim update

2006-01-23T13:41:00.000-06:00

Here be Tim. Tiny Tim. He's seen better days. He's soon to be banished to the land of wind and ghosts.

Remember, nothing is permanent. Make sure not to waste your time sunbathing like Tim did.

Still, he regrets nothing. Further updates to follow...probably.

Just what is he trying to hide?

2006-01-16T17:30:00.000-06:00

More crime in the snow...It was too late for this guy by the time I found him.

Someone messed him up real good....

I returned to the scene two days later, to document the decomposition of the subject. A man appeared in the window...

"Excuse me...what are you doing?" he asked.

"Oh...I'm just taking a picture of your snowman."

He stared at me incredulously, like I was pissing in his yard.

"I take pictures of snowmen in the area...I kind of document their lives."

"I'm gonna have to ask you to leave now."

"Ok," I say, trying to set it up so I can get at least one good shot.

"Seriously, right now...don't even take a picture! Leave right now!"

At this point I see that he has a phone. Holy shit...is he actually going to call the cops?

"Ok...have a happy new year," I call out, quickly snapping a picture, hoping it will turn out, but pretty sure it won't. And as you can see in the final picture, it didn't.

snow buddha

2006-01-10T21:14:00.000-06:00

This happy guy was located only a few doors down from the Calvinesque display pictured two posts below. This is obviously a creative neighborhood, one that I'll have to make sure to check after every snowfall. At least until the police tell me to stop.

Our whole town is sprinkled with pockets of creative people, mixed into the upper-lower-middle class types and the red-blooded blue collared midwestern folk. Our household, plus our neighbor, who is a musician, make up the creative, or perhaps more accurately described as bohemian, part of our 'hood. Most of the other people work at the nearby prison or window factory or drive trucks for a living.

Buddah says, "Possessions are fleeting. Soon all will melt away like so much snow."
Yeah, he can be buzz-kill....

Look how many nuts I can fit in my mouth!!!

2006-01-06T16:07:00.000-06:00

I've never seen the mouth of a snowman constructed completely out of peanuts...they must've been leftover from recent holiday parties. As far as snowmen go, this one is pretty unremarkable, even in today's world creativity-surpressed children. Even the squirrels were so unimpressed that they left his mouthful of booty unlooted.

As I was walking back to the car, after taking the final picture of this man-o-snow, a car pulled up in front of the house. A man got out and eyed me suspiciously as I left. He then walked right up to the snowman and carefully inspected him, then looked at me and Sy as we drove off. He had a sort of "why the hell are you taking a picture of that piece of crap snowman?"look. I'm pretty sure he wrote down our license plate.

Calvinesque, no?

2006-01-04T13:36:00.000-06:00

Part of the reason I decided to start documenting snow-creations was because I love how creative people are in the medium. This display reminded me of some of the things I saw in Calvin and Hobbes.

Notice the snowman in the background slaying the other snowman laying defenseless on the ground. Brilliant!

Another view of the killing fields...by the time the slaughter concludes, I think the surviors will envy the dead.

Meet Tiny Tim...

2006-01-02T12:57:00.000-06:00

A few days ago (I think it was December 29th) it snew, or snowed, whichever you prefer. It was a nice heavy, wet snow, excellent for packing...sort of. It was a very weird snow, great for making snowballs, but for some reason it would not stick to itself when it was rolled along the ground. Therefore, I had to awkwardly pack it into small spherish shapes, leaving me with a shorty snowman, maybe two feet tall. You can get a sense of how tall it is from the minidaschund inspecting it. I thought it might be easy to document his life and eventual demise without missing any major stages, because I would see him every day. My son named him Tiny Tim.

Here we've added a combover to completely disintegrate any shreds of dignity he may have remaining.

January 2nd: It's slightly above freezing today, and all the snow that was sitting on the branches over Tiny Tim is melting, raining down a slow mortality. You can see he's already lost his eye to the ravages of global warming, and his mouth is drooping alarmingly, like he had a stroke or something. I fear he's not long for this world...check back for updates, and keep him in your prayers.

Murder doesn't take a winter break...

2005-12-31T18:06:00.000-06:00

It's always sad to see snow-on-snow crime....

This fellow was questioned, but claimed to be out of town at the time of the tipping...

However, the surveillance camera says otherwise...that's him in the background, just to the left of the red van....cold-hearted bastard!